Tears Streaming Down My Face

I did not cry when my Grandmother died. Not one single solitary tear. I felt...cold. I feld sad, sorrowful, sure. But tears never streamed down my face.

I rarely cry when I read books, watch movies, or listen to people tell stories that for normal people, really do bring tears. Don't get me wrong, I feel emotion, anguish, sadness. But I rarely, if ever, cry.

Why is it that crying is such a difficult task for me?

I understand, I comfort, I mourn, I anguish. I care, I love -- I feel.

But I don't cry -- at least not for others.

But I do cry. for myself. when my thermometer finally bursts, and all the anguish built up inside of me explodes like some roman candle, I do cry. But its a selfish cry. I cry for myself, and myself alone.

I guess that is the lesson I need to learn -- how to cry for others and forget myself.